Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Don't Tell Me What You Don't Know

I've been reading a lot of blogs from unmarried young women about how to treat a husband. What? Unmarried women telling me how to do something they've never done?! Why would they think that they can pass on that wisdom. They can quote Scripture, but they cannot intelligently expound on it.

I agree with Scripture about how a woman should treat her husband. I strive and desire to fulfill my end of a Godly marriage. But these women, who have never been married, cannot explain to me how to treat my husband.

A marriage is an intimate union of two perpetual sinners. The closer you draw together, the more painful that sin becomes, for both of you. Unmarried women have never experienced this pain and can only imagine it. For them to write their aspirations and goals of being a godly wife is great and noble. For them to tell me how to do things in my marriage when that have no idea of the depths of joy and pain that go with marriage is unreasonable and illogical.


  1. Well said. I have to chuckle every time some one without children tell me how I should handle one of mine. Life is interesting, isn't it?

  2. If an unmarried woman can't explain to you how you should treat your husband, then unmarried pastors/preachers shouldn't be able to preach on marriage, either, following your logic. You agree, or disagree?

  3. NellieBugs, yes, I would say that an unmarried preacher would be LIMITED in how deeply they could preach on marriage, the same as a man would have a hard time preaching to women about embracing their Biblical femininity.

    The women I was referring to are stay-at-home daughters, a growing trend in fundamentalist churches. The Bible exhorts older women to teach the younger women how to love their husbands and raise their children, but just because stay-at-home daughters may be older than me doesn't mean they can teach me what they know very little about. They can teach me great deals about a dynamic relationship with God and I would expect them to do so, but they cannot teach me much about marriage.

  4. Stay at home daughters.... It just sounds so sad and I'm not sure I understand. Is that what happens when no one wants to court you or when you're courted but it doesn't work out? Those are a daughter's options? Get married or continue living under your father's rule, taking care of his house?